"I want to live like I know I'm dying"
I have been pondering an interesting phrase. Its the one above funnily enough. "I want to live like I know I'm dying.... " Its from a song that's just been released by an old favourite of mine, Thousand Foot Krutch. It has me thinking, what exactly does this mean? What does that look like? Because, I know, that without even going into the depths behind its meaning, I already love it. So here we go, picture it:
It would change everything. Period. No exceptions. If you were dying, if you had a time limit on your life, every single thing would change for you. Your actions, your views, your hopes and dreams would have a different light on them. How you make your decisions, the thoughts in your head, everything. Your life would become more purposeful...
That's without God in the picture. Put Him into that picture. God telling you that your dying. God showing that your past actions mean nothing compared to what they need to mean. God showing your how your thoughts need to be from this point. God giving you a purpose to pursue....
Think the movie 7 Pounds (the film with Will Smith who trys to redeem a poor choice in life by sacrificing his life for 7 others), except, instead of searching for redemption, you take is greater, its to ensure other people have the chance to be redeemed. The ultimate selfless act you, as a human being could do, not to simply save a life, but to help save their soul....
It would be the final thing you did. The grand closing scene on the stage that is life. You are the lead character. You know the lines. The lights are on you now, you know the curtain is going to close soon. Do you move? Do you take action?
The moment I accepted God as my father, Christ as my saviour, the Holy spirit as a weird fellow that does some funky stuff. The moment I began to serve them, my life became God's. I joined in relationship with Him, the end result being that one day, I would be with Him forever. Until that day comes, I will be used by Him. Whatever the cost is, it is already paid in full.
I want to live like I'm dying. Because really, lets face it, we are dying. Our time here is short, our lives a blink of an eye. Our job is to help others have this, this freedom from death. What happens to us, is nothing. It is nothing, knowing our lives will be spent, knowing that God will not just spend our lives but spend them well.
To finish off with a quote:
"Change starts with us, if you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything."
So stand with me, turn our mindsets around, and start this war of change.
LJA
Wednesday, 30 May 2012
Grabbing the bull by the horns
We are not ment to fight
temptation.
To fight temptation is like fighting
a bull....
Hands on.
When you have a rifle slung over
your shoulder....
Kill temptation before it can
do damage.
Kill it when you see it....
Kill it, because you were ment to fight
much bigger things.
LJA
Saturday, 26 May 2012
The Price Tag
One month down the track, I have finally done a new post.... Feels kinda weird....
Ok so here is the update:
I am on the other side of the world. I am about 1000 miles away from the ocean, living 1 mile above sea level. The state I'm in is dry. Think of needing to actually needing to drink 3 liters of water everyday if you dont want to wake up with a tongue like a microfiber towel of death. I am in Colorado....
To be honest aside from the heat and lack of fresh water that i am allowed to swim in, I love this place. It is the same land area of NZ (give or take a few square Km), 1 million more people and wayyyyy cheaper to live.
I left a place that was green. Humid on the hot days and freezing/damp on the cold ones. A place where I had family, friends, a amazing job and a military I loved. I had my childhood memories and my teenage memories in the same town, I had gone through the ups and the downs, I had forsaken God and He had pulled me back in this place called Home. I left the little brothers and sisters I had seen grow up, I left my parents just as our relationship had started to change for the best (thanks to God). I left my friend whom I have had for over 15 years, my brother in Christ and in flesh, the man who had been by my side through all of the above, the man I confide in and who confides in me... Scott. Do I miss all I have mentioned? Sure. Do I feel it in my heart as a loss or as pain or as a longing to return?...
No.
Odd really isn't it?
I came over here because God showed me a flower. He showed me a butterfly. He showed me a lioness. He showed me the woman who has taken my breathe away and made my heart leap with joy and wonder. It was like sitting on the top of one mountain and looking across to another with a telescope: I had caught a glimpse of this lone flower in the distance and God said "Go". I went through a journey in heart which turned my life upside down. I went from a man fed his insecurities with feeding off others emotions and isolating my own, to a man who is searching, who has longing for God on an insatiable level. A man where finally after causing so much pain and hurt, after bottling all my emotions, to a man who is learning what it is to be a man of God. A man who now has a relationship with God....
The cost of pursuing this flower, the cost of following what God has told me to do, some have said is great. The people over here who hear about my story think I'm crazy, the one who knew about me before I arrived thought I would never return to this butterfly (I love proving people wrong by the way). Why would this guy with such a questionable past and a fully set up life on the other side of the world come back for this lioness. No one thought I would return for McKenzie.
She herself couldn't believe what I had "given up" to come here. It took me a little while to think of what to say to her when she said that. This is what I said (paraphrase here, I'm better in the moment):
"People are always looking for specials and price cuts, they are looking around so they don't have to pay full price for what they want. They shop around on the internet first, then only if they have to, do they go and do it in person. If your willing to pay the full price for something in the store straight away, what your buying is worth more to you, has a value far greater, than the price"
To me, the "sacrifice" of coming here, is nothing. Why? Because God took me to the store, showed me what my heart truly desired and said buy it. What I got for the price tag is something I couldn't have comprehended. Something that is growing in value and worth to my soul everyday. Every moment I spend with McKenzie is a blessing I can't describe. To be able to have a relationship between Myself, God and McKenzie is incredible.
I have finally found out the cost of following God. I have learnt out the formula of it all with Him. It is pretty simple....
He is the God who asks all
And
He is the God who gives all.
It was 7 months of payment and painful learning for me before I held McKenzie in my arms once more. I was prepared to wait years, because I knew God would deliver. In those 7 months, I knew that if God showed us that we were to stop our relationship, I would have without hesitation or loss. Because what ever you invest in and give to God, He will use for something far greater than you can imagine.
If you know God is wanting you to do something, and it is gonna cost you, do it. Because you will find out the price tag meant nothing compared to the true value of what He will give to you in return...
LJA
Ok so here is the update:
I am on the other side of the world. I am about 1000 miles away from the ocean, living 1 mile above sea level. The state I'm in is dry. Think of needing to actually needing to drink 3 liters of water everyday if you dont want to wake up with a tongue like a microfiber towel of death. I am in Colorado....
To be honest aside from the heat and lack of fresh water that i am allowed to swim in, I love this place. It is the same land area of NZ (give or take a few square Km), 1 million more people and wayyyyy cheaper to live.
I left a place that was green. Humid on the hot days and freezing/damp on the cold ones. A place where I had family, friends, a amazing job and a military I loved. I had my childhood memories and my teenage memories in the same town, I had gone through the ups and the downs, I had forsaken God and He had pulled me back in this place called Home. I left the little brothers and sisters I had seen grow up, I left my parents just as our relationship had started to change for the best (thanks to God). I left my friend whom I have had for over 15 years, my brother in Christ and in flesh, the man who had been by my side through all of the above, the man I confide in and who confides in me... Scott. Do I miss all I have mentioned? Sure. Do I feel it in my heart as a loss or as pain or as a longing to return?...
No.
Odd really isn't it?
I came over here because God showed me a flower. He showed me a butterfly. He showed me a lioness. He showed me the woman who has taken my breathe away and made my heart leap with joy and wonder. It was like sitting on the top of one mountain and looking across to another with a telescope: I had caught a glimpse of this lone flower in the distance and God said "Go". I went through a journey in heart which turned my life upside down. I went from a man fed his insecurities with feeding off others emotions and isolating my own, to a man who is searching, who has longing for God on an insatiable level. A man where finally after causing so much pain and hurt, after bottling all my emotions, to a man who is learning what it is to be a man of God. A man who now has a relationship with God....
The cost of pursuing this flower, the cost of following what God has told me to do, some have said is great. The people over here who hear about my story think I'm crazy, the one who knew about me before I arrived thought I would never return to this butterfly (I love proving people wrong by the way). Why would this guy with such a questionable past and a fully set up life on the other side of the world come back for this lioness. No one thought I would return for McKenzie.
She herself couldn't believe what I had "given up" to come here. It took me a little while to think of what to say to her when she said that. This is what I said (paraphrase here, I'm better in the moment):
"People are always looking for specials and price cuts, they are looking around so they don't have to pay full price for what they want. They shop around on the internet first, then only if they have to, do they go and do it in person. If your willing to pay the full price for something in the store straight away, what your buying is worth more to you, has a value far greater, than the price"
To me, the "sacrifice" of coming here, is nothing. Why? Because God took me to the store, showed me what my heart truly desired and said buy it. What I got for the price tag is something I couldn't have comprehended. Something that is growing in value and worth to my soul everyday. Every moment I spend with McKenzie is a blessing I can't describe. To be able to have a relationship between Myself, God and McKenzie is incredible.
I have finally found out the cost of following God. I have learnt out the formula of it all with Him. It is pretty simple....
He is the God who asks all
And
He is the God who gives all.
It was 7 months of payment and painful learning for me before I held McKenzie in my arms once more. I was prepared to wait years, because I knew God would deliver. In those 7 months, I knew that if God showed us that we were to stop our relationship, I would have without hesitation or loss. Because what ever you invest in and give to God, He will use for something far greater than you can imagine.
If you know God is wanting you to do something, and it is gonna cost you, do it. Because you will find out the price tag meant nothing compared to the true value of what He will give to you in return...
LJA
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